Our June Crazy Cook is Kathy I. from Mesa, Arizona:

I had to send this because I still laugh about it 25 years later. I was reminded of it again watching Martha's Kitchen on the Food Network. I've also been promising myself an apron.

I was never really a cook before I married. I was on my own at the early age of 16, not by choice, no living parents. Another long story. I was dating a guy who was the master baker at a fancy hotel in Las Vegas and he wanted me to cook for him, so he bought me the "I Never Cooked Before Cookbook." The first recipe in the cookbook called for scrabbled eggs with sugar. Also advised to not confuse sour cream with cream that has gone sour. He threw away the cookbook after the first order of scrabbled eggs.

I continued to try. I was making a recipe while my girlfriend was over and she was looking at the recipe that called for "5 small New Potatoes." She said, "Kathy, do you have 5 small New Potatoes?" I said, No, but I have two very large ones that are only three days old." She had to explain to me about "New" Potatoes.
If either were to see me now, they'd still be laughing because I am a great cook, with four critics who always look forward to Mom's cooking.

Note: For those of you who read this and thought to yourselves “Hmmm. . . what ARE “new potatoes” anyway?” here’s a definition straight from the Food Network Encyclopedia. New potatoes are young potatoes (any variety). They haven't converted their sugar fully into starch and consequently have a crisp, waxy texture and thin, undeveloped skins. New potatoes are small enough to cook whole and are excellent boiled or pan-roasted. Because they retain their shape, new potatoes are particularly suited for potato salad. The season for new potatoes is spring to early summer. Potatoes of one variety or another are available year-round. Choose potatoes suitable for the method of cooking.